Another night of hell

Last night was a hell night. He came home in a bad mood and criticized me from the moment he walked in the door, until we went to bed. He broke my spirit temporarily last night because of his threats and meanness, but I went to counseling today and I feel better. I only have a week left to endure this crap, so hopefully I can just get through it. I don't really feel like recounting everything, I am just glad that I am getting out. I did find a diary that I wrote in from 1998, and would you believe that I was having the same problems with him then, except not as extreme as now. I don't know why I have been so stupid all these years. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that he has always used the fact that he is supposed to be a Christian and we need to be Christians together. I am a Christian, even if I don't act like one sometimes, but I do not believe that God would want me to stay in a relationship like this one. I just wish I hadn't wasted 14 years of my life with this man. What a waste, but I am wiser now and I just pray I can get out of this safely and start over.